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Monday, January 29, 2007

Mutant Powers

I have a theory that Harmony has some innate mutant powers that are beginning to show themselves. For those who don't know, the X-Men comics have been quite popular since the 60's. The premise is that there are dormant or undeveloped mutant genes in everyone's DNA...except in some people, they are fully developed, which results in strange and fascinating powers such as psychokinesis, "mutant healing factors," super-strength, telepathy, etc etc etc.

Among the X-men is a very popular one named Gambit. His power is that by touching any object, he can charge objects with kinetic energy. Now, this lets him charge up objects such as his trademark playing cards, which he then throws at things and the things explode with great fervor. Why they don't explode before that is beyond me.

Anyways, I posit that Harmony has this ability as well. At first, I thought she might possess psychokinesis, but then I began to realize that stuff only went crazy when she was in physical contact with it (or in close proximity). Whatever she touches seems to want to jump out of her hands. Things even just in her proximity have a tendency to crash to the floor with great aplomb. When we got our wedding pictures back, they came in a box. I was sitting here at the computer, minding my own business, and she was sitting next to me. Next thing I know, with a crash, the pictures are all over the floor. This also has happened with toothbrushes (haven't landed one in the toilet yet), stuff on closet shelves, brooms...food.

As for me, my mutant abilities would be rather boring and not very good comic book material. I seem to have sleep-related powers. Usually I will wake up anywhere from 0 - 30 minutes before my alarm goes off, and drift in and out of consciousness until it actually does go off. If I needed to, I could probably even go without an alarm clock. I'd only be able to do that if I were on a schedule where I could afford to get up anywhere within +/- 3o minutes of intended time. I also possess the uncanny ability to be fully functional shortly after waking up at 6AM.

Imagine a comic series about that:
JunkMale, saving the world by getting up before his enemies and overwhelming them while they are still stumbling about in their sleep-laden stupors! When an EMP blast has eliminated all functioning alarm clocks in this world, JunkMale will be the one to wake everyone up! Curse thee succubi and incubi...you are no match for...JunkMale.

Anyone else want to post their uncanny mutant powers?

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